Posted on February 15, 2021
In your most vulnerable moments, are you afraid that if you really show up for your horse, he might not like you?
Are you afraid that if you own up to your fear, lack of knowledge, or lack of experience, or other perceived short-coming you might have to give up your horse, and by proxy, give up your dreams?
Have you already at times visualized loading him in the trailer and waving goodbye?
Have you maybe even resigned your heart to the idea that you may never ride?
Have you come to these conclusions all in your head, on your own, without even talking to your horse?
Before you lose all hope, try this:
What if you go spend some time with your horse, and crack your heart open, let just a little vulnerability seep out. What if you lay your fears at the feet of your equine friend; spill your guts. Tell him that you feel like an imposter, or you’re afraid he wont like you. Tell him that you’re terrified to ride, or scared to get hurt or worried you might hurt him. If you find that you don’t trust your horse, tell him that too.
Be as open and honest as you possibly can. Allow your emotions and tears to flow freely.
Our horses are authentic with us 100% of the time. We owe it to them, and to ourselves, to give the gift of our authenticity and congruence. That is where they live, that is the language they understand.
Once you have spoken your truth to your horse, take a deep breath in through your nose.
Exhale slowly, and fully, out through your mouth. Take a moment to reflect.
What insights came to you while sharing with him? What insight has he shared with you in this time together?
No decisions are necessary at this juncture. There is no pressure to “do”.
Simply be present in the moment.
Once you feel complete, thank your horse for holding space for you.
From the Heart of a Mare
Posted on February 9, 2021
My wish for every client is Joyful Partnership, filled with safety, trust, fun, and adventure.
The wish many of my clients have in the beginning, is for me to wave my magic fairy wand and in a single session, fix the issues that he or she is having with their horse.
Bibbity Boppity Boo – Perfect Horse from a Pumpkin.
The reality is, it doesn’t happen overnight. The bigger reality is, it’s often my human clients that have more to overcome than their equine partners. Fear, low confidence, old story, old trauma, new trauma, grief, these are all roadblocks to having a successful, joyful partnership with your horse. These are all issues that manifest themselves in the horse-human relationship.
Using a combination of Equine Gestalt Coaching & Co-Active Horsemanship I encourage my clients to dig into the muck that is holding them back. The deeper they dig, the more the relationship with their horse and with themselves, begins to blossom.
This blossoming is the cornerstone of my Horsemanship program. Often, we find that once the relationship between horse and human is nurtured and repaired, mixed with a little extra equine knowledge, it creates the “secret recipe.” We see the behavioral or training issues of the horse begin to disappear.
This isn’t a fast process, usually clients who are determined & dedicated are with me anywhere from six months to 2 years, others are self-professed “Lifers” because they enjoy the work and deep connection so much, and there are others who reach out only when new blocks pop up, we work through them, and part ways until next time.
There is no one “right way” to achieve your goals. The key is patience, consistency, listening ears and love for your horse.
If you and your equine are interested in working with me, please contact me using the form below!
I’m located in Colorado, however I have some programs in the works to help reach people & equines across the nation, if you’re interested in something out of state please reach out for more info.
Category: Gestalt, Horse Training, Horsemanship, Relationships and Healing Tagged: behavior probems, equine assisted, equine facilitated, Equine Gestalt Coaching, fairy dust, fear, Gestalt, gestalt therapy, grief, healing, hope, Horse Lovers, Horse Training, Horsemanship, horses, horsewoman, horsewomen, joy, magic, personal trauma, relationships, trauma
Posted on August 9, 2020
As swiftly as the wheels began to turn, they began to fall off. I looked around at what I had built so far, with Sunrise Horse Training and Dark Horse Healing, both two years in the making, intentionally opposite ends of the spectrum- I’d felt called at the time of creation to cater to separate, vastly different demographics.
Now all I felt was stuck.
I simmered on my new dilemma for several weeks. I decided to bring Sunrise under the umbrella of Dark Horse. I scheduled a meeting with one of my dear mentors, Melisa Pearce (founder of Touched by a Horse, creator of the Equine Gestalt Coaching Method) to discuss going forward in this way, but before the meeting even occurred I saw the blockade in my way.
The style of these two worlds, the horse world and the alternative “woo-woo” world, would not mesh.
Not in the divisive, polarized world in which we currently live. I can and do easily walk the line between the worlds, but not all my clientele would be so inclined. The plan to mesh my businesses was dashed, and to no ones surprise, my conversation with Melisa confirmed what I already knew. There goes that wheel.
My next decision was to shut down Sunrise Horse Training all together and go whole hog into Equine Gestalt Coaching… but my primary income comes from Sunrise and I was feeling stifled inside the box I’d created within Dark Horse Healing. My dark horses, and dark heart, and dark hair, and dark clothes are absolutely authentic to me, but I no longer wanted to live within those walls and parameters all the time. There goes that wheel.
I started to, accidentally on purpose, morph my training business into something else; something less structured, something sweeter and softer and freer than what I had been taught and trained to do, something that was beginning to really feed my soul as I took note of the relationships that were being built between my clients and their horses.
I decided I would shut down Dark Horse Healing all together and go whole hog into Horse Training and this new path I had found. I started down this trail with just two wheels left, and the further I got down it, the louder the call of my two years of extensive, intensive training as an EGC Coach got. That wheel flew off the wagon in flames and rolled far far away, the other, with nothing to hold it up, collapsed pathetically on the ground.
So what was I left with?
Once again, the blinding flash of the obvious presented herself to me in the form of a horse.
Several horses. All Mares. Over the past year their divine feminine energy has challenged me, comforted me, nurtured me, frustrated me, broken me down, and then, (with the help of a kind gelding), healed me.
As I look back on the last 14 years of my life, the footsteps that have been by my side, consistent and unwavering, belong to my beloved heart horse, Molly. The biggest lessons I have learned have come from this mare, and the mares I have been lucky enough to encounter these past few years as a professional trainer. I have learned from geldings too, to be sure, but it is the mares who leave the lasting impressions on my heart.
With their quiet grace and gentle hearts, their fiery tempers, their wild souls, their humor, and their demand for respect that must be earned and is not easily given, I found the answers to my questions.
So with no wheels at all, I walk beside my horse and our equine friends, and I offer our gifts to you, as partners on your journey to wholeness and healing.
Without further ado,
May I Present: